Hidden Blessings

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, when you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking in anything." - James 1:2-4

After the accident I prayed a lot for God to let me understand why that had to happen. Why did my family have to go through this?

I remember laying in the hospital after my medical team had just done a dressing change they knocked me out for and I was in a lot of pain when I woke up. A nurse came to move my IV because the site they had it in had stopped working, so they needed to move it for about the third time. They yanked that IV out of my arm so hard that I literally yelped.

Taylor was there with me when the nurse left and at that moment it was really hard to see why I had to go through the trauma. I just kept crying and asking him why- why the pain? why the death? why the accident?

Now that I'm a few months removed and on the better end of that situation, I can see a few blessings. And for those I'm very thankful. I know God's purpose and lessons for my life often come to be a lot different than I would envision them - Lord knows no one would ever beg for this to happen. But as the saying goes, you pray for something and then God doesn't immediately give you that characteristic, he give you opportunities to shape you into that characteristic.

And that's definitely what he's done here.

I've become more responsible with my time and money. There are so many extra things I have to do during the day- making phone calls on my mom's behalf, paying her bills, etc. that I've been forced to grow up. A few of my relatives have commented on how well I've handled that. I'm proud of myself for doing it also.

Talking about feelings. So it took me over 23 years to realize I don't discuss my true feelings about lots of things to many people. There are a few people like my Mom, Dad, Taylor and other close friends that I feel most comfortable with crying in front of, and would never do it in front of some people. That's just how I am, I guess. It took my counselor confronting me about it (in a way) for me to realize I kind of just adapt to life. Growing up I was forced to handle unideal situations (which who doesn't really?) and instead of talking about them, I just shut it out and figured out how to survive rather than discuss my feelings. My counselor said that's very common and I'm not crazy for developing that, but it got me thinking that I really didn't realize how much I keep in. I'm trying to be better about that.

My mom has committed to stop smoking. Lord Jesus this is the biggest blessing to come out of this entire situation! My mom has been a smoker since she was in high school. Before the accident when if I ever had to picture my mom at the end of her life and what health problems she would face, I just knew it would be lung related due to her smoking. Thankfully because of the accident and her being in the hospital she has gone through all the withdrawals necessary and hasn't smoked in over three months! She has told all of us that she won't ever smoke again - and honestly, I'm afraid of what it would do to her now if she did. She had some lung damage from smoke inhalation and her lungs were actually burned. They have healed now, but I'm scared of what just one cigarette could do to her. And thankfully she is too.

I've put less emphasis on physical appearance. Now from my last post you know that they had to shave my head in the hospital. And I would be lying to you if I said I didn't miss my hair. But having to go through life with no hair and wondering if people thought you were going through chemo or something is an interesting thing. As bad as this sounds, I wondered if people thought I was a lesbian because of my hair and the fact that all I could mostly wear was unflattering, comfy clothes that it looked like I either didn't care or didn't have a husband to care about. (I know this is only a stereotype, but if I'm being honest, that's truly how I felt.) I couldn't wear my wedding ring for about a month due to swelling, which made those feelings even worse. Right before the accident I was watching and reading a lot of beauty blogs about how to do hair and make-up. In a weird way, I think I was putting too much emphasis on physical appearance. And we all know what Jesus can do when we do something he doesn't think is right. Yep, he'll take your hair! Now, I'm not saying this it's bad to wear make-up, but when it takes over it's too far. I was probably on the verge of too far.

Along with physical appearance, I do have some scars as a result of the accident. Some are on my face, but it can mostly be covered with make-up. My biggest scars are on my hands and I have some scar tissue that is still painful/itchy. The doctors say my skin will probably return to normal over time, but honestly I wouldn't hate it if they stayed. In a weird way it reminds me of what I've gone through and overcome. New people I meet don't usually notice them anyways, and it's nice to have some physical representation of what I went through as a burn survivor and can tell my story to other burn survivors.

I'm trying to take every day one step at a time and I'm very thankful to God and his healing power, both physically and mentally. Last week I was able to see my mom and she looked better than ever. She was so present in mind that it was like old times again. We were able to snuggle a little in her bed like we used to, and I was able to tell her about life for us while she was in the hospital. It was a very special time. It was like I got to be the mom and I was taking care of her.

I will always remember that.

Whirlwind

Well, I've neglected the blog realm long enough that I've shamed myself into writing again.

So, let's recap what's been happening since over...eight months ago, shall we?

1. I got married! (the new header picture is proof, obvs)

2. Taylor and I are adjusting to living together, of which my affection for can be determined by how much he snores or plays hockey on his PS3. Just kidding. Sort of...

3. I have a new boss at work! He is simply wonderful and I'm so happy we have a great guy like him on board with our organization's mission!

4. I traveled out of the country for the first time! Yes, the daughter of the travel agent has never been out of the country till she was married off. For shame, father. We went to Playa Mujeres, MX and loved every second of it. Except the 4 a.m. plane ride home.

5. I was sort of in the hospital for a week. Which I think is partly why I've been neglecting my blog so much (besides the whole getting married thing). Getting this out in public view is still a little unnerving, considering I'm not sure who knows and who doesn't. But I'll explain below.

I visited home (Kansas) the weekend of Oct. 8 and was staying at my mom's house. The weekend was pretty normal; she had a friend in from Missouri that I hadn't seen since the wedding, and some of her friends came over for a BBQ. Typical weekend. Taylor was with his dad in Dallas at the OU v. Texas game (his first ever to attend, so I let him slide from coming home with me...). Sunday morning I was getting ready to leave to head to my dad's house and have lunch with him. I started to pack and was fixing my hair in the bathroom when our home exploded due to a propane leak which was ignited when the furnace kicked on.

First, there was a flash fire along with the explosion which leveled our two-story house. After the fire subsided I knew we had to get out. I immediately yelled for my mom and made sure we could get out of the house. 3 of the 4 of us made it out. Our dear friend Mary Lou was not so lucky.

After the ambulances and fire truck arrived and we were assessed my the medical staff (and called my family, of course) we were taken to a hospital in Wichita and debride. I stayed in the burn unit for seven days, and my mom was just down the hall from me. My prognosis was second degree burns to 15% of my body. This included my head, face, hands/left forearm, abdomen and tops of my feet. I was bed bound for just over a day. The second day I was there they had to shave my head because I had burns on my head. Not to mention my hair was basically ruined anyway.

My mom was air-lifted to the hospital. They put a ventilator while she was in the ambulance. Her prognosis was second degree burns to 45% of her body with a small third degree burn on her foot. They shaved her head also. She had several complications while in the hospital- they weren't uncommon to burn patients, but she fought through them like we knew she would. She has been through so much since Oct. 9 and is expected to make a full recovery, which I am ecstatic about (to say the least).

So, the past few months have revolved around lawyers, insurance, hospitals, physical and occupational therapy, wigs, Vaseline, doctors, meetings and lots of trips to Wichita. The house is still under investigation and no person/business has been found at fault yet.

Also, I've left out a lot of details due to a few reasons:

our lawyers advice and to protect my family. I have received phone calls and messages from Wichita area reporters wanting to interview me (one of them was while I was still hospitalized) about the accident. I have refused any interviews thus far, and because I know the media does want to get their hands on some information, I don't want to release public information on my mom's condition. If anyone has questions they can contact me personally.

It's been such a hard road going through this at 23. I'm her only child so many medical decisions fell to me. Taylor and I are now handling my mom's affairs until she is able to. I began and finished occupational therapy for my hands. I'm also seeing a trauma therapist to help with my emotions (and sometimes lack-there-of) around this experience.

So, here is my attempt and letting the blog community know what's been going on in my life. If you have seen me since Oct. 9 and I looked different, that's why.

Funny enough, I miss my hair so much. I have a wig, but it just isn't the same. Those of you who grew out their hair before their wedding know what I'm talking about. It had just gotten long, then I was forced to chop it off. At least the wedding was out of the way!

Now to the better things that have happened after the accident:

1. I got a new car!

2. Taylor and I went skiing with his family over New Years

3. I had a really good first Christmas with Taylor's family and juggling the in-laws now

4. Taylor and I are hoping to save for a down payment on a house when our lease is up

5. When we get a yard, we want to get a puppy! (breed and name to be determined...)

6. I'm coming up on the one year anniversary at my job!

7. I had to replace my laptop because of the accident and now have a MacBook Pro

8. Taylor and I did Black Friday for the first time this year- it was an adventure to say the least

9. Mom is doing significantly better and becoming more independent each day.

Thank you to everyone who heard about the accident or just saw something was wrong and prayed for my family! Please know they meant the world to me and my mom.

Nightmare Pt. 2

Not to my surprise, I had another wedding nightmare. It wasn't as bad before, but it was still pretty bad.

I don't remember there actually being any decor in the church whatsoever.

There were no tuxes, so the groomsmen all wore different colored sport coats and one wore a red vest with no jacket for some reason...but in my dream I didn't know this until I saw the pictures, which were also bad.

I didn't have a hair appointment scheduled. I got my make-up done at the mall and it was awful.

I don't remember the reception at all.

I think I remember not smiling when I came down the aisle, which is the complete opposite of what I intend to do. Who looks sad on their wedding day, right?

And finally.

Taylor and I were interrupted after the ceremony (if you get my drift), by wedding guests coming to our apartment. That's not only rude, but awful and those people should be ashamed of themselves.

It was just wrong.

Oh yeah, and I get married 4 months from today! Eek! Can't wait to live with that boy.

Ick.

Dear Stomach Flu,

I don't like you. Not even a little bit.

I haven't thrown up since I was 12. And not only did you break my record, but it happened to be during my first pre-marital counseling class at church on Wednesday. I had to leave class and then make Taylor take me home. I'm sure all those other couples thought I just got nervous or something!

And now I missed two days of work and a dear friend's bachelorette party/personal shower extravaganza. So I'm sad.

...but I did lose three pounds. And I'll take those, but surely I can't keep this flu thing up just to lose weight until August. That just wouldn't be wise.

"Things"

My dear fiance has been such a peach during this whole wedding planning extravaganza. With this being his first (and only ever) wedding, and not being on the female persuasion, there are certain "things" he doesn't know fall into the process.

Here's an example of his incomprehension:

Me: "I think my dad is going to buy a new suit for the wedding."

Taylor's Mom: "Yeah, I think you're dad might get a new one, also."

Taylor: "Is that a thing?"

Me: "I bought a new dress today that I can wear to my bridal showers."

Taylor: "Is that a thing?"

Me: "I can't wait to register for a Kitchen Aid stand mixer. I hope I get one!"

Taylor: "Is that a thing?"

Taylor seems to be learning such new things everyday. At this point I could probably tell him ANYthing is a thing and he probably wouldn't ask twice and just do it.

Hmm...this might work to my advantage.

Discontinued

You know that bridesmaid dress I just blogged about? The one I spent days looking for? Well, it looks like I'm going to be looking a little longer....

I knew they were running out of sizes, but chose to believe it would all work out (After a warning call from a bridesmaid last weekend). Tuesday night I got a phone call from my Maid of Honor saying they didn't have her size in the dress.... we (Her wonderful mother and I) called and tried to see if maybe they were on backorder, etc. But no. Discontinued.

Only a few dresses left in that color, and my ever-so-pleasing bridesmaids were scheduled to have some rib bones removed, but I decided all that wasn't worth the effort just to fit into a dress....

Darn it.

So now, the maids and I are off to shop for new dresses on Sunday. I hope we find one that can compare, if that's even possible. And Melissa will be in town for it, yay!

In the words on Mama Karen (MOH's mother), "It just wasn't meant to be."

Que Sera, Sera.

Progressing

I've been pretty successful in the wedding planning department lately.

After a bridesmaid's dress minor breakdown, and my wonderful bridesmaids talking me down from the ledge, I finally made the decision. Oh, and I even consulted a wedding message board (low point, definitely) to get outside opinions. This stuff ain't so easy folks.

But here we have it:

A good choice, if I don't say so myself. I ordered it to see it in person, even tried it on and it looks great! Now that's one more thing to check off the list.

As of last night, Taylor and I picked out our wedding bands. After eating dinner at Pepperoni Grill in Penn Square mall we had an impromptu stroll by Helzberg's where he bought my ring. It was so cute seeing a ring on his hand : )

Today, I made a cake tasting appointment. I discovered this bakery has 40 cake flavors and 30 icing flavors. Whoa. I'm so pumped!

Oh, and one of my favorite activities to do now is wear my hair piece around my apartment when I do things like clean my room. I just makes me happy and I can't wait for it to be in my hair in 161 days!

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

I wouldn't be me (or a girl for that matter) if I didn't change my mind a few times. Especially on what's supposed to be the greatest day of my life.

So, I've changed my mind on a few things, well, one big thing mostly.

The colors.

Originally I wanted to go with a ice blue, black and white theme. Well, those days are long gone.

Taylor and I both really like blue, so I would have liked to use it. Finding it is another story...

I was searching for the right blue. The perfect blue. Not baby shower blue; not cobalt; not navy. A magic blue that would compliment every one's skin tone and would come with a low price tag.

I'm here to tell you that blue doesn't exist. At least within my realm of research- and believe you me, I exhausted The Google many, many nights.

Then there was the whole thing of using a 'winter' color in an August wedding. A little "bass akwards", as my Grandma Betty would say. I thought about using black bridesmaids dresses, but decided against it.

Now, ladies (no gentlemen here, I'm sure) I bring you the new colors:

purple and apple green.

(not Barney, though.)

Ideally, this picture. I just love it. Fun, vibrant, classy.

Purple is quite possibly my second favorite color, so it works out.

Oh, and if you're wondering what Taylor's input was, it was short and sweet:

"No orange."

A true OU fan through and through.

Do Over

Last night I had my first wedding nightmare. And it was a doozie.

Taylor and I got married at the top of a cement stairwell.

In pitch black

By the wrong minister (it was a woman instead of Taylor's uncle.)

I wasn't certain that the photographer was even there. I did see a flash a few times, though.

I attempted to write my own vows, but couldn't read my handwriting so I made them up on the spot. (And they sucked.)

It was just awful. I know there is zero chance any of this will actually happen, but just seeing it in my dream made me mad!

Why can't brides dream about a fabulous honeymoon, instead?

I Knew the Way You Know About a Good Melon

After watching countless episodes (multiple times) of TLC's Say Yes to the Dress, you might say I'm a pro at "trying on" wedding dresses.

I know Kleinfeld's Fashion Director Randy's do's and don'ts for brides (stop looking after you've found "the one", don't try things on outside your price range, don't bring the entourage, etc.) and tried to follow them when shopping for my own wedding dress.

And, as you can see the purpose of this blog post: I found THE dress!

After only two stores and two days I said yes to my dress! Thankfully, the search didn't have to continue cause it seriously gets exhausting! Even for the person trying on the dresses. I stood for over three hours Saturday, had my body corseted into many dresses and wasn't able to breathe at times...what joy!

But my dress (THE dress) is just perfect. It's something I've pictured myself in, something very "me". It even matches my ring! : ) Bonus!

It was the first dress I tried on at the second store, and when I came out I just felt like a bride-something I was missing from the first few I tried on at the other store. The veil and other special touches just put it over the top and I KNEW Taylor would absolutely love it.

Also, to other/past brides: this whole white vs. ivory debate... I chose ivory. Does this make me less of a bride? It looked SO much better with my skin tone. At this point I guess I don't need advice (the dress is already on order), but I'm just curious!

To future brides,

Get a dress that you can see YOU in! You don't want your guests to see the dress first and not the beautiful person in the dress! I had this debate with a frillier, more feminine dress. I loved it, but it was almost too trendy compared to what I pictured myself in. I knew I had found my dress when both my mom and I both started tearing up. It was a special moment for the both of us! You'll have yours and you will just know, kind of like when you know your fiance is the one! (Cheesy, but true.)

*Title brought to you by When Harry Met Sally

Bling Story

So, since being engaged I've had many opportunities to show off the ring.

Graduation, Christmas, work friends, friends I didn't see over break who came back to school, people I just met....

While I think my ring is beautiful, I do understand that it's not everyone's taste.

One of the best compliments I received was that "It was the best ring I've seen go through a candle lighting in a long time." (This is mostly thanks for my fiance, because I did not pick it out)

However, the responses I don't like from people (usually ones I don't know) are as follows:

How UNIQUE

How INTERESTING

How PRETTY (Her voice rose which means she was lying. She also looked like she was lying so I'm allowed to say that)

These phrases usually fall from an older crowd (the marquise and yellow gold generation), so I understand.

What you probably don't know if exactly how perfect this ring is for me.

Why yes, it's a beautiful ring, but it has a special meaning.

The center stone is sort of a family heirloom. This is a weird story, but I have a weird family, so bare with me...

The stone has been worn by two women in my family: first, my mom in the form of an engagement ring from my father. Then, by my grandma when she was married to her second husband.

Now, it is in my possession and moving on another generation! My grandma always wanted me to have it since it was from my dad, and it has such a special meaning to me every time I look at it!

Taylor gets credit for the rest of this ring, and he did such a great job! : )

Paying it Forward

So after reading and commenting on Cara's blog, I found myself involved in a bit of a predicament.

Yes, I'll admit I wanted to receive some handmade items.

(Who doesn't love free, hand crafted with love things?)

But I was sucked in. I'll admit it.

"I promise to send something handmade
to the first 3 people who leave a comment here.
To be eligible, you must also post this in your blog,
offering the same thing to 3 other people.
The rules are that it must be handmade by you and it
must be sent to your 3 people *sometime* in 2011."

Who can say no to that, right?

So bloggers, 3 of you can comment and receive some form of craft from me.

It may not be the best thing ever, but I'll assure you I will try my darndest!

Comment away, friends!

Let's Discuss

Fellow brides and past brides, lend me your ears

Well, I'm officially in wedding planning mode. It's constantly on my brain, I just can't help it! I been thinking about this day for so long, and now I can actually act on it - not just dream. Weird concept, because sometimes your dreams don't exactly align with reality, but I'm getting on the ball.

Things I have done:

1. Ceremony venue deposit - MRCC

2. A unofficial date - Aug. 6, 2011

3. A few bridesmaids

4. Tried on dresses

5. Been to a bridal show (and won $250 to a bakery to get my cake done!)

6. Checked into photographers and found a few I like that are within my small budget.

7. Surfed The Knot and WeddingBee entirely too often.

8. We have colors! - black, white, ice blue/aqua

9. A reception venue I haven't put a deposit down for

10. Some honeymoon research has been done

11. Changed my mind so many times not only my head is spinning, but so is my fiance's.

Things I need advice on:

1. Do I really need to do 'save the dates'?

2. How do I pick a photographer? (especially on such a small budget...)

3. How much do flowers cost?

4. What's something cool I can do at my wedding that isn't a photo booth or a candy bar?

5. How do I know when I've found "the" dress? What are good places to shop at that don't rip you off?

6. What costs came up that you didn't anticipate?

Fellow brides and past brides, lend me your ears. Any vendors and advice would be appreciated!

Discuss amongst yourselves.

Well, I graduated college, but...

Now moving onto more important things, like TAYLOR AND I ARE ENGAGED!

Yes, my friends, after years on having this blog and previously hinting (not to subtly) at how unsure I was feeling, and antsy about it all happening, Taylor finally popped the question!

December 14, 2010, Taylor and I headed out on our annual trip to look at Christmas lights and eat cheesecake at the Cheesecake factory. We started out in Edmond moving toward OKC when we stopped by his parents house to "pick something up." Upon walking in, Taylor divulged that while we had agreed to not exchange gifts this Christmas, he has indeed purchased me a gift.

Yep, I knew something was up.

After walking in I found a dimly lit living room, a beautiful Christmas tree and a fire in the fireplace. Taylor escorted me over to the tree where we sat on the floor and he handed me a wrapped box to open.

I then opened three more boxes with very special notes to us, and the last one instructed me to wait for a fifth gift Taylor was about to give me.

Taylor then asked me to stand up where he told me how much he loved me and that I was his best friend, then he said something utterly romantic: "I lied to you."

What?

"Saturday, I wasn't in Stillwater. I drove up to Wichita to have dinner with your parents."

Long pause. Mostly out of shock that he did that. (good shock)

Then Taylor took out a ring box from a stocking hanging on the mantle, got down on one knee and asked me to marry him!

I was so excited and relieved at the same time! It had finally happened! The moment we've been waiting for, but (I) we thought would have to wait a few months. After putting the ring on my finger, I was smiling and crying with joy at the same time. Hugging and kissing my future husband and feeling like I was on top of the world.

Taylor's parents were at the top of the stairs waiting for the "all clear" signal, so we went and told them they could come down. Sherry started crying and I started crying all over again. I gave Monte and Sherry both big hugs and they began to divulge the inside information Taylor had told them to keep quiet.

We then called a few family members and then just let it soak in for the next few hours. Needless to say, we didn't get a whole lot of Christmas lights in that night.

It was a wonderful night. I will never forget it.

Now to start the wedding plans... where to begin? Maybe I should find a job first.

See Ya

Things I will not miss about college:

• Buying textbooks that cost an arm and a leg.
• Dealing with Financial Aid every year and filling out the FAFSA.
• Blackboard
• Caf food
• Reading about subjects I'm not interested in or not very good at doing.
• The people that "whoop" during the Alma Mater
• The CAAP test
• Having no free time/social life

Things I will miss about college:

• Countless teachers and staff who have been so helpful, encouraging and wise.
• Free things
• Free IT services
• My friends
• My Pi sisters
• Not having an excuse to sing and dance in a funny outfit on a stage.
• Having basically everything you need within a 1/2 mile vicinity.
• Hearing the same stories over and over again by Dr. Patterson.

College ending is such a mixed bag of emotions for me. I'm ready to move on, but I have so many good memories at OC. I have no doubt that I picked the right college and found a major that interests and challenges me. I've worked hard over these four and a half years, and I am proud of myself for a lot of reasons. Only one thing could make graduating better...if I had a job!

In Summary:

Well it's been a while, folks!

My life has been wonderful and crazy at the same time, but that's how it has been for the last four years. You'd think I'd be used to it by now, I assure you I am not - just in time to graduate.

The Last Semester:

1. I'm working with Eagle Angle - our campus' weekly live news show.
2. Looking for my first big girl job.
3. Finishing my last semester with Pi. :(
4. Working a wonderful internship at St. Anthony Hospital.
5. Still procrastinating on homework. What else is new? This next week will be crazy! I have two papers and a book report presentation due, and an interview to get ready for on Friday.

The fun thing about this semester is that I don't have to take any classes directly involving my major. With the exception of one business class, but it's more entrepreneurial in nature. So it's freed up a little time to explore and concentrate on other subjects, which is kind of nice.

I can also say that I officially graduate NEXT MONTH. It hit me a few days ago. December 17 I will be walking across that stage and out of OC - I place to really don't want to leave, but must. I know it's time, but it's hard to say goodbye to something that's had such a significant place in your life. I never felt nearly this nostalgic about high school - I was glad to say goodbye, but this time I'll have to prepare and remind myself I'm no longer a student.

This quote has been on my mind a lot lately and I'm so happy I found it:

“All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.”

— Anatole France

This gives me a little comfort in the seasons of life, and I know without a doubt I will leave a part of myself at OC. However, it is only to continue to build a better "me". God's path is undeniable, I've learned. I'm trying to see his plan for my life right now as I'm making so many decisions about my future. It's so tough at this age cause I think I can do a lot on my own, but I know there is a grand plan for it all.

Undateable

It's a lovely afternoon. I'm sitting on my couch relaxing with my wonderful Peach Bellini candle from Bath and Body Works (straight from heaven) and watching at little VH1. Right now they are counting down the Top 100 things that make guys undateable.

I realize I'm not technically on the prowl, but I've had my own experiences with undateable guys (and actually dated some of them), so this is a list for those dating women out there.

Here are a few I agree with:

1. Bluetooth

This is usually how you meet a Bluetooth wearing guy-

You're in 7-11 filling up a Big Gulp cup and you hear a guy say "hey what's going on tonight?" (or something similar) - you turn around wondering who this strange person is and being the nice girl you are, nod and smile to be polite.

This is where the Bluetooth wearer turns on you.

He has the audacity to give you a weird look like "why are you looking at me- I don't know you," and continue filling his cup with a grape slurpee.

Bluetooth is a no go.

Unless you don't have any arms.

2. Vanity plates

I must confess, I bought one of my high school boyfriends a vanity plate. I was 15, "in love" and it was his 16th birthday party. So I went to a mall kiosk (legit) and got it airbrushed for him. What did it say, you're wondering? Well, I couldn't decide at first. He drove this olddddd, white Ford truck. Like 1960's old. It had seen better days, but he liked fixing it up and I was forced to ride around in that "car". He often referred to it as "The White Dragon."

Yes. This is real life.

After entertaining that idea, I quickly decided against it. I went with something much more classy.

Chris (the undateable boyfriend in this scenario) was a big fan of Superman. And by fan I mean he drew the "S" logo on all his undershirts, but instead of an "S" it was his initials: "CV".

So, I said to myself "why don't I put that on the plate for him! Duh!"

To make a long story longer, I did it and he LOVED it.

Two months later he dumped me.

3. Wearing sports jerseys

Boyfriend is way into sports. That's actually an understatement. He visits my apartment merely to steal ESPN, I'm convinced. I sit by his side and am forced to eat endless amounts of Rotel dip and Tostitos during baseball, golf and hockey seasons, Olympic curling and beginning last weekend: college football. He's an avid OU fan, and he shows his pride by wearing an OU jersey.

He refers to the team as "we" on many occasions. He obviously dedicates a lot to the team.

To tell you the truth this doesn't bother me that much. Just give me the Rotel and my laptop and I'm a happy girl. My boyfriend is certainly not undateable, you silly VH1 show.

4. Excessive Ed Hardy.

No one - and I mean no one - should ever be allowed to own, buy or re-sell Ed Hardy. It's bad for the economy, our planet and is probably the cause of global warming.

Ed Hardy = excessive hair products, therefore an excessive amount of hair spray which is made of aerosol, which hereto, destroys the ozone layer.

The answer is always no when Ed Hardy is involved.

5. Man shakes

Boyfriend works in a pretty manly environment. It's competitive, male dominated and requires a suit (a big ego booster). So naturally, he comes home with quite a few tales from undateable men in his office. One in particular chooses a fist bump - but it doesn't end just there. Fist bump, then brings his hand back and makes an explosion noise.

One time Taylor came home and showed me some handshake where you turned your index and middle finger into two legs and you walk them away from the other person's fingers...or something like that. So weird.

Not necessarily undateable, but definitely embarrassing.

Now I know this blog is read by all girls - let's not mince words - so what undateable qualities do you think I missed?

I know you've got stories.

Birthday Wish: Granted

Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful news was given to my family today.

The day before my birthday, no less. God and his timing...

1. Dad's liver is functioning NORMAL, just like your's and mine.

2. His cancer markers went from 1,739 in May, to 24 in July and are NOW at 2.5!

3. ALL of the cancer has SHRUNK.

4. He won't have to be on chemo the rest of his life. He is eligible for surgery in about six months.

5. I don't really have a fifth point, but I would just like to add that GOD IS SO GOOD.

So many emotions went through me today. I smiled and cried with joy at the same time for this true miracle God blessed us with.

When his oncologist told my family that he might only have 90 days left in the beginning of May, we could have easily been planning his funeral right now. Now, he can plan his life.

As my mom put it and as I had worried about in an earlier blog post, "he'll be around for your graduation in December, to walk you down the aisle and to see his grandchildren." - that is the best present I could have ever received. I cry even as I type that sentence. God is so good.

We still have a long road until his is a cancer survivor, but the news today helped us get through all the heartache over the past three months.

Thank you, thank you, thank you to whoever reads our story and has prayed for my family. Your support and blessings have not gone unnoticed.

Birthday List

If anyone wants to buy me a gift I'll take a pair of these in a size 8...

Please and thank you.

Anniversaries and Excursions

August 6, Taylor and I celebrated 5 years of making fun of each other and being best friends. How did we celebrate this wonderful occasion? By attending his cousin's rehearsal dinner, obviously. No, but really - it was such a wonderful night. I know that last sentence made it sound dreadful, but we weren't mad at all! It was such a beautiful night and they are such a great couple.

However, we took some pictures to commemorate the special occasion.

The next day, Tiffany and Reagan got married!

And many people enjoyed their photo booth and props.

(Taylor and Reagan's Aunt and Uncle)

We managed to get a few pictures with them out of the thousands they took that day.

Their wedding and events surrounding it was so beautiful! This is the only wedding I've been too where I felt I knew both the bride AND groom well. (Usually you are just friends with one of the other.) It was so neat to see two people who I know are so wonderful for one another marry each other.

The rehearsal dinner was such a cry fest (happy tears, of course), and I did my fair share. It's such a true blessing to see two Christian people promising a life-long commitment to one another. I hope I never forget to remember that with all the weddings I have/will attend.

Onto another adventure....

Just two days after the wedding, I left with two friends on a road trip through eight states: Oklahoma, Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, Nevada, Utah, Colorado and Kansas. Whew.

Here's just a few pictures. I haven't uploaded them all, but here are a few that will do the trip justice. Note: We never took a picture with all three of us together...how unfortunate.

Stopping at a gas station while we were going the wrong way trying to get fro Flagstaff, Ariz. to Las Vegas. (We didn't know we were going the wrong way yet.)

Accidentally stopped at the Hoover Dam after going the wrong way... I desperately wanted something that said "Hoover" on it (obviously), but everything was ridiculously priced, or turned into a "dam" joke. No thanks.

THE BUFFET! And my seven desserts...

We went to the Wynn, which was supposed to be the best buffet in Las Vegas by some magazine, so we went with it. It was $35, but the food was so worth it! There was an ENTIRE ROOM of desserts being freshly made- creme brulee, cookies, tiramisu, fresh fruit, strawberry shortcake....paradise. All kinds of crab legs, prime rib, sushi, a pasta station and more that you could ask for.

Not to mention, the hour wait in line gave us some people watching time. There was a "person" we saw and tried to decipher his/her gender. We still have no clue.

After, we walked around Vegas a bunch to see all the hotels we'd only seen on movies and television.

We stayed at the Luxor - the pyramid shaped hotel. The hotel and staff were so great!

The next day we headed to Utah and happened to find a scenic lookout around sunset.

There are few things I rarely enjoy more than a good sunset or sunrise. Especially over something that resembles the Grand Canyon.

If I had to chronicle one of the best moments in my life, seeing the sun rise over the Grand Canyon is definitely in the top 5. It's just indescribably beautiful and I will always love the Grand Canyon forever because of that moment.

After Utah, we went to Colorado and stayed in Grand Junction, then Estes Park with Ashley!! I don't have those pictures uploaded, yet, but it was so wonderful to see her!

Now, I'm home, tired and have a to-do list for next week. School starts very soon and I have a lot accomplish before then. Trip home, buy books, apply for MY LAST LOAN EVER and finish MY LAST SEMESTER of school.

Yes.